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Sample Issue:
HUMOR * OVEREASY*
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This Site Created for the Enjoyment of the Entire Family
Great to see you again!
A big HELLO to all of our new subs!!!
Sure hope you enjoy your time here....sit back, relax and enjoy!!!!!
OVEREASY will be in your mailbox 5 days each week....Wednesday thru
Sunday.
Put a great big smile on your face
As each new day you start
You will find you will walk a lighter step
If there is laughter in your heart!
If laughing is not your cup of tea
And smiles for you are rare
Read on my somber frowning friend
Smiles and laughs with you I will share
~ Lee ~
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COMMENTS FROM THE EDITOR
__________________________________________________
it was kind of a cool and rainy day yesterday, but the rest of the
holiday weekend promises to be a good one with temps in the 80's and
90's. A perfect way to end the summer!
~ Lee ~
___________________________________________________
START YOUR DAY WITH A GIGGLE !
___________________________________________________
sent in by skulkingdawg (thanks, Patricia)
The United Brethren church in Parsons, Kansas was having a program,
and one of the women was supposed to say, "The ass stuck his head
out the window and brayed."
The woman didn't want to say "ass" in church and asked if she could
change the word to "donkey".
The other members insisted that she call it an ass, because that's
what it was called in the Bible.
One person reminded her of the story about Jesus riding an ass into
Jerusalem.
The woman worried about her line right up until the fateful day of
the program.
When her turn came, she stood up in front of the congregation and
said, "The donkey stuck his ass out the window and brayed."
___________________________________________________
TOON TIME ! !
Be Careful What You Wish For
http://www.lablaughs.com/clean_toon.php?id=C20000830 ">
Click Here
___________________________________________________
SOMETHING SPECIAL TO SHARE
___________________________________________________
AMBER ALERT
visit this link:
http://www.codeamber.org "> Click Here
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Animal Rescue Site
Please tell ten friends (or more) to tell ten today!
The Animal Rescue Site is having trouble getting enough people to
click on it daily to meet their quota of getting free food donated
every day to abused and neglected animals.
It takes less than a minute to go to their site and click on "feed
an animal in need" for free. This doesn't cost you a thing. Their
corporate sponsors/advertisers use the number of daily visits to
donate food to abandoned/neglected animals in exchange for
advertising.
Here's the web site! Pass it along to people you know.
http://www.theanimalrescuesite.com "> Click Here
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Breast Cancer site
The Breast Cancer site is having trouble getting enough people to
click on it daily to meet their quota of donating at least one free
mammogram a day to an underprivileged woman. It takes less than a
minute to go to their site and click on "Fund Free Mammograms" for
free (pink window in the middle). (There is nothing to sign up for
and no cost to you.) The corporate sponsors/advertisers use the
number of daily visits to donate a mammogram in exchange for
advertising. Here's the website - Pass it along to all your
friends!!
http://www.thebreastcancersite.com/ "> Click Here
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Thank You For Helping Me
http://www.positivethoughts.com/202pt.htm "> Click Here
Goodnight, God
http://www.positivethoughts.com/goodnightgod.htm "> Click
Here
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You'd Shine the Brightest
http://www.funnies.com/Starfield3D.htm "> Click Here
Friends Like You Are Hard To Find
http://www.funnies.com/hardtofind.html "> Click Here
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Once in a While
http://www.joygreetings.com/once.shtml "> Click Here
My Wonderful FriendThe More You Give
http://www.joygreetings.com/moregive.shtml "> Click Here
The More You Give
http://www.joygreetings.com/moregive.shtml "> Click Here
Inspiring Thoughts
http://www.joygreetings.com/inspiringthoughts.shtml ">
Click Here
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sent in by Michele (thank you)
On this day in 1774 Betsy Ross asked a group of colonists for their
opinion of the flag she had made;
thus creating the first flag poll.
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History of Grandparent's Day
http://www.geocities.com/Heartland/Forest/5675/gramhistory.html ">
Click Here
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Beach Baby
http://www.cutefunnyanimals.com/beachbaby.shtml "> Click
Here
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sent in by skulkingdawg (thanks, Patricia)
I was very pregnant, and it was rotten luck when, several days
before my due date, my husband fell from the porch roof, sprained
both ankles and was restricted to crutches.
So when I went into labor and he couldn't drive, I took the wheel,
stopping every time I had a contraction.
Finally, we got to the hospital. I dropped him at the maternity
entrace, and he hobbled off to the admitting desk, where the nurse
told him to go to the emergency room.
No, it's my wife," he told her. "She's in Labor."
"Where is she?" the nurse asked.
"She's parking the car and bringing in the bags."
[Thanks to Reader's Digest.]
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sent in by cookie62 (thank you)
Check out this really cool picture...It has probably been altered
but cool anyway.
http://soloshideaway.home.att.net/443/maiden_rock.htm ">
Click Here
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Woodmobile
http://www.wowfunny.com/pic.shtml?3429.jpg "> Click Here
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Happy Grandparent's Day
http://www.dobhran.com/greetings/GRgrandparent.htm ">
Click Here
Kids on Elections
http://www.dobhran.com/humor/GRhumor94.htm "> Click Here
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sent in by cookie62 (thank you)
People are like trees.
Some are destined to be pillars,
others are destined to be toilet paper.
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Stop monkeying around and love me!!
http://www.aikenslaughs.com/forfun/funny550.html "> Click
Here
Do you have valuables to clean?
http://www.aikenslaughs.com/forfun/funny555.html "> Click
Here
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Rock-n-Roll Cat
I'm one rocking cat! Wanna hear my guitar solo? YEAH!
http://insanehumor.com/cgi-bin/clk.cgi?dl=1519 "> Click
Here
The Little Engine That Couldn't
Try as it might, this little engine simply couldn't do it...
http://insanehumor.com/cgi-bin/clk.cgi?dl=1542 "> Click
Here
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Cool Cat
http://www.clublaugh.com/item.php?id=120 "> Click Here
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Love Will Keep Us Together
http://www.wow-animals.com/pic.shtml?3596.jpg "> Click
Here
flying jaws of death
http://www.wow-animals.com/pet.shtml?1363.jpg "> Click
Here
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Sparky
http://www.goofyhumor.com/ggcartoons/?car=90.gif "> Click
Here
Team
http://www.loonyhumor.com/jkcartoons/?car=343.jpg "> Click
Here
Pontius Pirate In Rome
http://www.goofyhumor.com/maccartoons/?car=pontiuspirate-
in-Rome2.jpg "> Click Here
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Dwell In The Positive
http://www.00fun.com/dwellonthepositive.shtml "> Click
Here
The Friend Ship
http://www.00fun.com/friendship217.shtml "> Click Here
At Your Side
http://www.00fun.com/1942.msp "> Click Here
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Trivia Time
The main character in which cartoon had a niece named Penny?
A. Inspector Gadget
B. Johnny Bravo
C. Tex Avery
D. Yogi Bear
send your answers to
humorovereasy@hotmail.com
yesterday's trivia was:
Who recorded the following song title?
Never Been Kissed
the correct answer was C. Sherrie Austin
congratulations to:
Marie
Kathy G.
Freida
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My dad bought my mom a piano for her birthday.
A few weeks later, I asked how she was doing with it.
"Oh," said my dad, "I persuaded her to switch to a clarinet."
"How come?" I asked.
"Well," he answered, "because with a clarinet, she can't sing...."
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sent in by skulkingdawg (thanks, Patricia)
this is a VERY neat site, esp. the radar...see Frances up close &
personal...
Active Tropical Systems
http://www.intellicast.com/Local/USNationalWide.asp?
loc=usa&seg=LocalWeather&prodgrp=RadarImagery&product=RadarLoop&prodn
av=none "> Click Here
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sent in by skulkingdawg (thanks, Patricia)
youngins ain't gonna believe it, but cigarette smoking was
encouraged thru ads...even Santa got into the act in the '40s...
Old Cigarette Ads
http://www.chickenhead.com/truth/index.html "> Click Here
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Baby's Named a Bad, Bad Thing
http://www.notwithoutmyhandbag.com/babynames/index.html ">
Click Here
<><><><><<><><><>>>>>><<<<<><><<><><><><><><><>
Farmers Almanac - Full Moon Names
http://www.farmersalmanac.com/astronomy/fullmoonnames.html "> Click
Here
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An Angel Is What I'd Be
http://www.joygreetings.com/angel.shtml "> Click Here
_____________________________________________________
OUT OF THE MOUTHS OF BABES
_____________________________________________________
sent in by skulkingdawg (thanks, Patricia)
"Take a pencil and paper," the teacher said, "and write an essay
with the title 'If I Were a Millionaire.' "
Everyone but Philip, who leaned back with arms folded, began to
write furiously.
"What's the matter," the teacher asked. "Why don't you begin?"
"I'm waiting for my secretary," he replied.
_____________________________________________________
COFFEE SHOPPE
ENJOY!!
_____________________________________________________
sent in by k9keeper (thanks, Jane)
A Faithful Dog Will Play With You
And Laugh With You -Or Cry-
He'll Gladly Starve To Stay With You
Nor Ever Reason Why,
And When You're Feeling Out Of Sorts
Somehow He'll Understand
He'll Watch You With His Shining Eyes
And Try To Lick Your Hand.
His Blind, Implicit Faith In You
Is Matched By His Great Love -
The Kind That All Of Us Should Have
In The Master, Up Above.
When Everything Is Said And Done
I Guess This Isn't Odd
For When You Spell "Dog" Backwards
You Get The Name Of God.
author unknown
_____________________________________________________
We have had many submission to the recipe book. Thanks to everyone
who has contributed and if you'd like to add to it, just send me
your favorite recipe.
Here is the link:
http://sunnysworld.homestead.com/HOEsHolidayRecipes.html ">
Click Here
*UPDATED*
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Help make HumorOverEasy grow
Please take a moment to throw a vote in for HOE, thanx ! !
Please rate this Ezine at the Cumuli Ezine Finder
http://www.cumuli.com/ezines/vote.html?pub_code=humoro ">
Click Here
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For comments,submissions,suggestions and questions
please drop me a line at the following addy.
(I'll get back to you as soon as I can.)
~Lee~
mailto:humorovereasy@hotmail.com
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Did a friend send this page to you??
Why not join *OverEasy* and enjoy every issue ! !
To Subscribe - - send a blank mail to:
HumorOverEasy1-subscribe@yahoogroups.com
Check out our special *ATTACHMENTS* page
To Subscribe - - send a blank mail to:
HumorOverEasyAttachments-subscribe@yahoogroups.com
_____________________________________________________
sent in by cookie62 (thank you)
I thought my Boss was an idiot, and quit, to work for myself.
My new Boss is an idiot, too ... but at least I respect him.
_____________________________________________________
sent in by Betty Boop (thanks, Betty)
"Warning Signs of Insanity"
You write to your mother in Germany every week, even though she
sends you mail from Iowa asking why you never write.
You're always having to apologize to your next door neighbor for
setting fire to his lawn decorations.
Nobody listens to you anymore, because they can't understand you
through that scuba mask.
You begin to stop and consider all of the blades of grass you've
stepped on as a child, and worry that their ancestors are going to
one day seek revenge.
You have meaningful conversations with your toaster.
You collect dead windowsill flies.
You cry at the end of every episode of Gilligan's Island, because
they weren't rescued.
You put tennis balls in the microwave to see if they'll hatch.
Whenever you listen to the radio, the music sounds backwards.
You wake up each morning and find yourself sitting on your head in
the middle of your front lawn.
Melba toast excites you.
You tend to agree with everything your mother's dead uncle tells
you.
You call up random people and ask if you can borrow their dog, just
for a few minutes.
You like to sit in cornfields for prolonged periods of time, and
pretend that you're a stalk.
You think that exploding wouldn't be so bad, once you got used to
it.
_____________________________________________________
DID YOU KNOW?
_____________________________________________________
sent in by BettyBoop (thanks, Betty)
The "snood" is the fleshy projection just above the bill on a turkey.
Famed British writer Ben Jonson (1573-1637) was buried upright in
Westminster Abbey's Poet's Corner because he died in debt and
couldn't afford a proper gravesite.
A chameleon's tongue is twice the length of its body.
A woodpecker can peck twenty times a second.
At 188 decibels, the whistle of the blue whale is the loudest sound
produced by any animal.
Portugal is the world's largest producer of cork. The country has
regulations protecting cork trees dating back to 1320. During the
1920's and 30's, it became illegal to cut down the trees other than
for essential thinning and removal of old non-producing trees.
There are 63,360 inches in a mile.
_____________________________________________________
QUOTES
_____________________________________________________
sent in by skulkingdawg (thanks, Patricia)
"Do not ask to walk smooth paths nor bear an easy load. Pray for
strength and fortitude to climb the rock-strewn road. Give me such
courage and I can scale the hardest peaks alone, and transform every
stumbling block into a stepping stone."
-Gale Brook Burket
My grandfather always said, "Don't watch your money; watch your
health." So one day while I was watching my health, someone stole my
money. It was my grand- father.
-- Jackie Mason
I knew these Siamese twins. They moved to England so the other one
could drive.
-- Steven Wright
_____________________________________________________
SHE WAS SO BLONDE
_____________________________________________________
sent in by cookie62 (thank you)
Just How Blonde Was She?
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
She Was Soooooooooooooo Blonde...
She thought a quarterback was a refund.
She thought General Motors was in the army.
She thought Meow Mix was a CD for cats.
She thought Boyz II Men was a day care center.
At the bottom of an application where it says "sign here," she
wrote "Sagittarius."
She Was Soooooooooooooo Blonde...
She took the ruler to bed to see how long she slept.
She sent me a fax with a stamp on it.
She thought Eartha Kitt was a set of garden tools.
She thought TuPac Shakur was a Jewish holiday.
Under "education" on her job application, she put "Hooked On
Phonics".
She Was Soooooooooooooo Blonde...
She tripped over a cordless phone.
She told me to meet her at the corner of "WALK" and "DON'T WALK."
She asked for a price check at the Dollar Store.
She tried to put M&M's in alphabetical order.
She Was Soooooooooooooo Blonde...
She studied for a blood test.
She thought she needed a token to get on "Soul Train."
She sold the car for gas money.
When she missed the #44 bus, she took the #22 bus twice instead.
When she went to the airport and saw a sign that said, "Airport
Left," she turned around and went home.
She Was Soooooooooooooo Blonde...
When she heard that 90% of all crimes occur around the home, she
moved.
She thinks Taco Bell is the Mexican phone company.
She thought if she spoke her mind, she'd be speechless.
She thought that she could not use her AM radio in the evening.
And last but certainly not least.........
She had a tee-shirt that said, "TGIF," which she thought stood
for... "This Goes In Front."
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Join me at OverEasy's archives. New subs will enjoy previous pages,
regular subs may find a link they wanted to save. Take a stroll
back and enjoy ! ! !
http://groups.yahoo.com/group/HumorOverEasy/messages This is an OPT-
IN Mailing List.
If you are receiving this mailing it means that YOU have requested
it be sent to you. THIS MAILING IS NEVER SENT UNSOLICITED.
To unsubscribe send a blank e-mail to:
humorovereasy@hotmail.com
Please be sure to include "UNSUBSCRIBE" in the subject section
_____________________________________________________
CLEAN FAMILY HUMOR
_____________________________________________________
You Are A Bad Cook If...
- The last time you tried to make toast the kitchen caught on fire
- Your apple pie bubbled over and ate the enamel off the bottom of
the oven.
- You make tuna noodle broccoli surprise for your family and the
surprise is that it glows in the dark!
- Your homemade bread can be used as a door stop.
- The leftover crumbs make a great replacement for kitty litter.
- Those annoying pest control companies keep pestering you, wanting
to buy and patent your recipe for candy Christmas cookies.
- You forget and leave a gallon of your homemade ice cream on the
porch overnight during a record busting heat- and the next
afternoon, not only is it still solid, but it tastes better.
- You hate rice, but you keep finding it floating around in your
beef stew.
- Your kids know what exactly peas porridge in a crockpot nine days
old tastes like.
- The EPA requires that all your garbage cans be marked with large
bright red 'biohazard' symbols.
- You use the smoke alarm as a cooking timer.
- You consider it a culinary success if the pop-tart stays in one
piece.
- Your dog goes to the neighbors' to eat.
- Your family buys Alka Seltzer and Kaopectate in bulk.
- When you barbecue, two of your kids hold water guns and the third
stands ready by the phone with 911 on speed-dial.
- Your family automatically heads for the dinner table every time
they hear a fire truck siren.
- Your microwave display reads "TILT!"
- Your two best recipes are meatloaf and apple pie, but your dinner
guests can't tell which is which.
- You've used three boxes of scouring pads and a bottle of Drano and
a crowbar, and that macaroni and cheese still won't let go of the
pan.
- You make tuna noodle surprise and the surprise is that it glows in
the dark and melts the silverware.
_____________________________________________________
SUBSCRIBER COMMENTS
_____________________________________________________
sent in by skulkingdawg (thanks, Patricia)
Sausage-Stuffed Jalapenos
1 pound bulk pork sausage
1 package (8 ounces) cream cheese, softened
1 cup (4 ounces) shredded Parmesan cheese
22 large jalapeno peppers, halved lengthwise and seeded*
Ranch Dressing (optional)
In a large skillet, cook the sausage over medium heat until no
longer pink; drain.
In a small mixing bowl, mix the cream cheese and Parmesan cheese;
fold into sausage.
Spoon about 1 Tablespoon into each jalapeno half.
Place in 2 ungreased 13-in.X9-in.X2-in. baking dishes.
Bake, uncovered, at 425ยบ for 15-20 minutes or until filling is
lightly browned and bubbly.
Serve with Ranch Dressing if desired.
Yield: 44 appetizers
*Be sure to wear rubber or plastic gloves when seeding the jalapenos.
that sounds like a really yummy recipe. I'll have to try it!
~ Lee
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No politician or scholar assured your freedoms. A SOLDIER did!
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Folks, I have certainly enjoyed our time together.
I hope I leave you with a smile on your face and giggles
that will last the whole day through ! ! !
****** Life is a journey, not a destination. ******
Keep Smilin!!!
~ Lee ~
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Help Out Abused and Negleted Animals
Hi, all you animal lovers. This is pretty simple. Please tell ten
friends to tell ten today!
The Animal Rescue Site is having trouble getting enough people to
click on it daily to meet their quota of getting free food donated
every day to abused and neglected animals. It takes less than a
minute to go to their site and click on "feed an animal in need" for
free. This doesn't cost you a thing. Their corporate
sponsors/advertisers use the number of daily visits to donate food
to abandoned/neglected animals in exchange for advertising. Here's
the web site! Pass it along to people you know.
http://www.theanimalrescuesite.com/cgi-
bin/WebObjects/CTDSites.woa "> Click Here
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Click below to view The Hunger Site's new e-card, and read on for
more info about how a simple click helps feed the hungry -- at no
cost to you.
Visit The Hunger Site (http://www.thehungersite.com/home) and click
the "Give Free Food" button (once a day per person). This simple
action gives more than a cup of food to a hungry person.
It costs you nothing. Funding is paid by site sponsors and benefits
two leading, nonprofit hunger relief organizations.
The number of people clicking directly determines the amount of food
that goes to the hungry, so please forward the message along.
WHY CLICK?
There is enough food in the world for every man, woman and child.
Yet an estimated one billion of the world's people live in poverty
and face chronic hunger. 24,000 die daily. 75% of them are children
under age five.
Clicking costs nothing but a few seconds of your time, and gives
help and hope to a person in desperate need.
Click here to give free food:
http://www.thehungersite.com/home
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Hi folks!
Just a few tips before you open this link: Depending on your puter,
it may take a lil bit to download. Please be patient, the download
time isn't a fraction of the time it took to put this together..
LOL..
Let the page fully load so you will enjoy it as we hope you will.
Don't run through the pages, there are hidden little *funnies* here
and there, just put your cursor over the pics, you will see them.
Now without further ado:
Humor Over Easy's Index Page
Easier naviagation in the scrapbook and all other pages.
(UPDATED)
http://sunnysworld.homestead.com/HOEscrapbookINDEX.html ">
Click Here
ATTENTION !!!
(please?)
We will be adding a new page(s) to HOE's scrapbook;
*HOE's Family Album*.
I can't be the only proud parent out there. C'mon folks, lets' make
this scrapbook a success. I'll bet some of you have precious
grandchildren you'd like to share with other HOE subscribers.
This is as safe a link as possible folks, only access to it is
through HOE's page.
We had such a wonderful response over the past holiday season, lets'
make our scrapbook grow.
I'm sure you have some great family pics taken this summer, last
spring.. winter? LOL.. we need to add to our scrapbook.
I'll bet we even have some new babies out there.. now, you gotta
share a new baby.
Remember, we would all like to read funny stories about your little
ones, your hubby, your wife.. any stories you'd like to share.
Thanks so much,
Lee
(please don't make me beg.. )
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I assume the content to be in the public domain, and every effort
is taken not to use copywrited material
when the author is known I will give credit, otherwise I give credit
to the listmember who sent it....... OverEasy assumes no
responsibility for unknowingly publishing copyrighted material
<><><><><<><><><>>>>>><<<<<><><<><><><><><><><>
Love to cook? Love to laugh? Join us at A to Z Recipes! We offer a
complete menu PLUS many reader recipe submissions in each issue.
From cooking Acorn squash to Zucchini, join us at A to Z Recipes!
To subscribe, send a blank email to: 62028-subscribe@zinester.com
<><><><><<><><><>>>>>><<<<<><><<><><><><><><><>
View some Clean Toons and say "hi" to Moi Miss Piggy
To subscribe, send a blank email to: cleantoons-
subscribe@Jokeworm.com
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DO YOU LIKE RECIPES? LIKE CRITTERS? Good Fixins comes to you 5
days a week with a yummy recipe, a food fact, and for fun there's
the CRITTER CORNER where we share our favorite stories about our
four-legged friends. Chocolate lovers will enjoy our weekly
indulgence in a heavenly chocolate recipe. Join our family today
and see what you've been missing!
Visit http://www.goodfixins.com today!
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Do you like clean humor? Then you will love Dave's Daily. A daily
dose of mirth in your e-mail.
To subscribe check out the form at http://www.smilesunlimited.net
or send a blank e-mail to daves-daily-subscribe@topica.com
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